Animal Magic / carry on camping.

One unnamed member of company X (Bob spelled M-A-R-K) went missing for 5 hours last weekend. Pissed out of his head he decided to walk back from the pub to the campsite. Oh dear bob who can even get lost during the day time while carrying a GPS system had no chance in the desert at night, with nothing but a belly full of beer to help out.

Wandering around aimlessly, bob gave up for a while and just stared at the stars. The coyotes started howling and bob in his pissed state thought it would be good fun to howl back…wrong. The coyotes got ever more excited and started howling and congregated in a pack and were getting closer to bob all the time, bob still howling thinking it was great…I can talk to the animal kind of thing…but then he could see in the dark lots of shadows and shapes…the bloody dogs had caught up with him. He shit himself and hid behind a cactus; fell in a ditch and cut himself to ribbons. This brought his senses back and sobered him up, eventually shaking off the dogs and getting back to base camp shortly before dawn; just before the missing persons file was opened.

US quote of the week

Q – couple to the pub singer at a hotel, “are the German couple here tonight?”

A – pub singer “no those two are English – those guys are with us in Iran”